The count down begins…

Here we go. This whole publishing my first book thing has become very real. In exactly two months from today, my story will be out there for the world to see.

My sleepless nights, my worries, my tears, my insecurities, my inner most thoughts.  All available for the bargain price of $2.99.

In a word, it’s terrifying. So terrifying that in my weakest moments, I consider pulling the plug on the whole thing. Who cares that I’ve spent over a year of my life writing it, who cares that I’ve already invested a small fortune on editing, promotion, etc. It kinda feels like I’ve spent the past year growing, nurturing, and caring for this thing deep within the most private part of me, and now it’s time to let it go, and give it to the word to rip apart.

You think I’m dramatic?  Maybe you’re right, but it’s the truth.

I worry about what people will think, about reviews, about not making my investment back…. I worry that everyone in my life will think the main character is me, and that all the people in my story are “them”.  I even worry about becoming too famous, and having stalkers! LOL Seriously… What’s wrong with me?

anxiety

#ME  Except a little more frantic… and my hair never looks that good… and I don’t own a top like that (But I wish I did.)

But what keeps me pushing forward is this; I wrote a story I love. I wrote a story I wanted to read. I wrote a story that made me laugh, made me cry, and filled my heart.

Yes, I’m fearful, I’m scared, and sometimes I want to throw my computer off a cliff and forget I ever had the idea to write a book.  But I’m excited too.

Until next time. 61 days and counting. 

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2 thoughts on “The count down begins…

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